Sleeping, what sleeping?
I started Monday at 7pm. Gio ate his solids, gave him a bath, massage, he was rubbing his eyes, pjs on quick, he fed and fell asleep. I put him in his crib and all was well until 750. Wake up crying not a little but I'm alone pick me up before I pass out crying. Calm him down back in his crib he goes, 9pm, 10 pm same thing, finally feed again and finally sleeps till 12 and then daddy rocks, he feeds at 2am, his crying is uncontrollable and then he all of a sudden can no longer support being in the crib. So in the bed he goes. Tuesday same process over again. Wednesday gio has cribitis, he is fast asleep and the minute a piece of him touches the crib he screams and crys. I lift him out and he sighs a huge breath of relief (I am not exaggerating) and goes back to sleep. Hold him a little longer and try again....crying non stop. This goes on till about 10 when dad gets home takes over, 5 min later asleep in his crib, still waking up every hour till about 12 then sleeps 2 hrs, wakes up sleeps 2 hrs till 7. Thursday night Gio wakes up early from his last nap so I let him play, I quickly eat dinner, time for an evening stroll, we get 4 houses down I see possible dozing occurring so I quickly turn back, bath time, feed and asleep he is woohoo! 730pm. I am beside myself, so I update some pics on FB, put his diapers to wash, about to drink some tea while catching up with Christine on the phone, I hear Gio cry (8:15pm) I wait, crying turns into all out disaster, hangup and start consoling him. I get him back to bed and he awakes in tears the minute I put him down. This goes on till about 1015, when dad gets home. Throughout that I probably let him cry for 3-5min intervals because I needed a break, refresh myself and start all over. In those 3-5 minutes he coughed and choked and went into hysterics, yea an hour or more of that I probably can't do. I think during one of those stints I sat next to his crib and talked to him while he cried, the coughing and choking got worse, the crying intensified and then I couldnt take it anymore. I sat in my bed with him in my lap and let him fight it through, I stayed quiet, he was smiling with tears in his eyes and snot coming down his nose. He looked into my eyes and smiled. I felt awful because I couldn't smile back, I was exhausted and my patience was thin and so I just needed to stay quiet. Finally I lay Gio next to me in the bed he started to cry, I massaged his head and shooshed him while he cried and he finally fell asleep. I moved away and he woke up, so I started all over and this time he stayed sleeping at 1015 when dad finally got home. Luan said lets just keep him in bed. I said nope transfer him over to the crib, but he is so peaceful. I told Daddy consistency! The nite persisted the same way. I was exhausted. Friday nites I work the late shift with Luan, so my mom took over. Of course he had no problems, but she plays and wears him out till about 9 and he finally falls asleep at 930. Wonderful, thats awesome, but Gio is used to getting tired and instead of taking que of sleep he fights it until he can no longer stand it and then needs to be consoled to bed. I am trying to get him to go to sleep earlier. Thankfully I get off of work at 2 so I still can enjoy some time with him, otherwise I would get home at 6 and then try to put him down at 7, no us time until the weekend.
So I read the Baby Whisperer, Sears, summarized Ferber, the NoCry Method and also some Weissbluth. I stayed away from Babywise. I called my Pedi for advice, the NP told me to CIO. She said he was big enough that if he did choke or vomit he can overcome it and wouldn't suffocate. Thanks very helpful. She said this is about you not wanting him to cry and that bond of feeding. Maybe she is right, but where does vomiting, crying and choking part of peaceful sleep. Whatever happens my main goal is for Gio to sleep a good 6 hr stretch so that he can rest and with time to stretch that out. I don't get why crying yourself to sleep are good healthy habits. I studied in school like everyone else, I am part of the group of Moms who study and research things for their children. When my NP said there are studies saying CIO is healthy and blah blah. I told her there are also studies proving otherwise. Everyone stands by the study that helps support their choice. She said I have not seen any. There might be some studies in the mail for her in the near future. I am just saying...if we are going to throw research papers around, well lets get both sides. When infants cry certain changes have been documented as increased heart rate and blood pressure, reduced oxygen level, elevated cerebral blood pressure, depleted energy reserves and oxygen, interrupted mother-infant interaction, brain injury, and cardiac dysfunction. (http://yourparentingsolutions.com/ages-stages/newborns/case-against-ferber-sleep) (I will have to post the real study later) Whether I believe this or not, it can happen and it might not happen. All I know when I cry for long periods of times, which I have who hasn't, or cry the ugly cry where I can't breathe, my head hurts, I get dehydrated, I get dizzy, I get nauseous, hell I choke sometimes. I am not talking about a tearjerker movie cry, serious crying. So back to my first rambling, whether CIO works or not, its not about the loss of Mother-Infant interaction, its the why would I want to enforce crying to sleep as a habit, where does that induce restful sleep? I have friends and everyone and their Momma telling me it works, awesome I am very happy for you, I just haven't gotten there yet and you know let's be honest its very tempting, Oh it is, trust me. During one of his crying stints I texted Luan in frustration "i am just going to let him cry till you get here" I didn't. As frustrated as I am, it frustrates me even more that he is not resting and if thats because I keep picking him up then so be it. Gio and I will be in harmony soon enough, maybe a month from now, maybe when he is 18, so be it. =p According to some books I am accidental parenting and enforcing bad behavior, in other books I am enforcing a bond and creating a strong future adult. See I told you there are books etc to support every behavior. I read these books to torment myself sometimes but at the end of the day I believe I am doing what is best for my son and that is all that matters, whether Billy bob or sue ann out there agree with me, who knows? who really cares?
I just finished watching Babies the movie. Amazing, put things in perspective and clarified alot. We will figure it out one day. Gio will not always be a baby and he will eventually sleep on his own. Luan talks alot of course, he says lets try CIO, I told him sure, Ill be away for the wknd you do it and Ill just deliver some milk, call me when its over. We are talking while Gio is cuddling with us, he looks at Gio, looks at me, and then says yea I can't. We are both big sissies. Hahaha and that's fine with us. Luan and I both slept with our parents till we decided to get out or who knows. It worked for them, it has to work for ous eventually, I am just enforcing some crib time. Well get sleep eventually, which actually we are compared to the last month where Gio thought I was an all-nite buffett, so some improvement. Yea Gio!
We are thankful for a healthy, happy, gorogeous baby boy! We love you Gio!
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